Baby's Got Her Blue Jeans On

I still listen to old-school radio in my car. I don't have satellite radio, I rarely listen to music on my iPod or iPhone (too much fussing with playlists and such, especially in high mitten season) in the car, and a tape deck in all of its 1982 glory stands where a CD player should rightfully reside. While tooling around town, I shuttle back and forth between about four stations, but sometimes the dial lands on a vintage country song.

These songs totally evoke my past. When I was little, my dad was a bartender, so you'd find me hanging out at Dan's Bar. (Our apartment was right up the street.) I'd beg for quarters so I could play tunes on the jukebox, and sometimes, I even danced in front of the jukebox, which is kinda hilarious. As research, I looked up a few of these songs, and I've included a selection below for your listening and viewing pleasure.

I remember I loved to wash glasses in the Bar Maid (a contraption that, to a kid, looks like it's constructed of massive pipe cleaners) behind the bar, even though I had to use all of my concentration to hold onto the swirling, slippery glasses with my small hands. I also cleared beer bottles from the tables and entered sales into the cash register--with ample help from my dad--when business was slow. I know that sounds wacky, but when you're little, being allowed to help out fills you with pride.

• Harper Valley P.T.A. by Jeannie C. Riley
• Baby's Got Her Blue Jeans On by Mel McDaniel
• Keep Your Hands to Yourself by Georgia Satellites
• Fishin' in the Dark by Nitty Gritty Dirt Band
• Tight Fittin' Jeans by Conway Twitty
• Luckenbach, Texas by Waylon Jennings (I believe I heard this first on my Urban Chipmunk album. Its title was a parody of Urban Cowboy, which had come out a year earlier. And it featured country singers with...you guessed it....the Chipmunks.)
• Swingin' by John Anderson

SantaLand Diaries

On December 11, we braved the snowstorm to see a stage adaptation of David Sedaris' SantaLand Diaries, which details Sedaris' stint as an elf at Macy's SantaLand. It was an o.k. performance. Just o.k. It made me laugh, and I was thrilled to support local theater. But I'm so accustomed to Sedaris' delivery from This American Life that nothing else measures up. His cadence and tone are so distinctive. They're snarky, yet deadpan; sarcastic, yet insightful. 

My favorite part is the scene where a child is throwing a tantrum at SantaLand. His mother informs him that if he doesn't behave, Santa will bring him coal for Christmas. The child's tantrum continues, unabated, and the mother asks Crumpet (Sedaris' elf alter ego) to support her in her coal argument. But Crumpet has had enough. He tells the child that Santa no longer traffics in coal. Instead, St. Nick is going to invade the child's home and strip it of all worldly possessions. Crumpet tells him: He'll take your TV and all other major appliances. He'll steal your furniture and your food. You'll be left shivering in an empty, cold house all alone.

Because of the storm, everyone in our party headed home after the play ended. Jason and I weren't ready for bed, though, so--after I'd made my requisite annual snow angel--we walked along the lake. The lake was cloaked in fog, and it, along with the icy variations on gray and white, made me feel like I was caught in a Victorian novel.

We looped around and somehow ended up at the Harmony's doorstep. (How'd that happen? :)) Our faces and clothes were crusted with snow, so upon entering, we After I'd repaired my running mascara a bit with some napkins from the bar, we settled in for a drink. We had the bar nearly to ourselves, excepting 5 or 6 people who lived within walking distance of the joint. Because it was so empty, we got to chat with the bartender about travel and a whole host of other things. We left after a few because everyone else had filtered out, and we didn't want to keep the bartender there just for us.

After we got home, we ordered pizza and watched The Man Who Came to Dinner (1942 with Ann Sheridan, Bette Davis, Monty Woolley, Jimmy Durante) until we finally dozed off.